My promise to tomorrow is to spend time when I have some more tomorrows to give some very direct feedback to systems that aren’t working for me right now. I only have energy for litanies – supplications, invocations, recitals where the call goes out and the faintest response hangs in the air not quite landing into resolution.
The systems failure litany goes on an on: carelessness, lack of problem-solving. A piece of equipment essential for life failed this week and one out of four hospitals contacted offered a solution (an expensive one, but a solution to get us through to the next step), the provider of the piece of failed equipment fell at every single hurdle. First the technician was on a cruise and his Dad who knew how to service but not fix was unable the help, then the promise of a replacement arriving was not fulfilled in the timeline offered, failure to return call with correct information and we are now living in hope this new timeline might be able to be fulfilled in the next 24 hours … I have lost trust and confidence … so let’s wait and see. It is difficult, and in a first world system, I am struggling to see why it is so difficult. I would have thought at these times support, efforts to the edges would be standard and not above and beyond the call of duty. I get to the point when someone, just doing the job they are paid to do in a timely manner, makes me want to send them flowers and chocolates as they are shine out from the rest.
I started my professional life as a social worker in a psycho-geriatric team and there I learnt so many things about creativity, regular and reliable reviews, the relationship between pharmacology and well-being, how to listen and observe, how to be in a multi-disciplinary team, how to advocate, when to be pragmatic, what to let go of and what to hang on to. Every day I let those learnings rise up and wonder whatever happened to our health system and all the intersecting and moving parts? It was a terrible system then, but we all worked together as a professional team to challenge it, make it better, undermine it, conspired to get new rules … we never lost sight of the most vulnerable person at the centre. It was truly a great place to learn and to make a difference. The people who I served didn’t even know most of the time due to their cognitive state, so we worked hard to take their cues and look at their past life to guide our decision making, listen to old friends, neighbours or family members if they had any (which wasn’t often).
When under stress I make mistakes and I accept mistakes and imperfections, we are all human … but these compound fractures are unnecessary and cause more stress for those who are least able to have more at this time in their lives.
When my tomorrow comes I am going to spend some of the days offering up unsolicited fearless and frank advice with courage and compassion, and a hint of the memory of my worst self.
Litany of my worst self
For when I want the share price to drop for the company whose piece of equipment failed and then their support failed further.
Lord have mercy
For when I want the complaints department officer who didn’t return my three calls for further information to have to give evidence in a parliamentary enquiry and be chased by a TV crew down the road.
Christ have mercy
For when I want the staff member at a country Victorian hospital to be subjected to a black out and a failed generator at their most vulnerable moment.
Lord have mercy
For when I want the doctor who wasn’t brave enough to be honest to be faced with some hard truths at a medical tribunal hearing.
Christ have mercy
For when I want to leave my best self behind and embrace my energy zapping worst self.
Lord have mercy.
Litany to any worker in the health system
Do your job.
We beseech you
Know your role and accept your responsibilities.
We beseech you
Help enable the system to work.
We beseech you
Actively disable the system not working.
We beseech you
Ask yourself: Is there anything else I can do to help here?
We beseech you
Be kind.
We beseech you
Be patient.
We beseech you
Be compassionate.
We beseech you
Pick up the phone.
We beseech you
Return my call.
We beseech you
Read the signs.
We beseech you
Listen.
We beseech you
Letters to 